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Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Mon Mar 09, 2015 9:27 pm
by polsongrizz
This guy needs a bat to the melon ...http://www.newslo.com/pat-robertson-unv ... -necklace/
“With all the gayness poisoning our great nation these days, you might think it’s only by God’s grace that I have managed to remain straight and healthy through it all,” Robertson told his viewers. “But, for once, this was no miracle—I have only my gay-repelling necklace to thank, which has kept all sexual degenerates at least 20 feet away from me for the last 44 years, ever since the stonewall riots convinced me the gays were coming for my heterosexuality.” :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :ohno: :roll:

Thrown in just for some fall off the bar stool laughs...http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?p=1090857

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Mon Mar 09, 2015 10:01 pm
by D1B
Religion. :dunce:

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:24 pm
by CID1990
Someone needs to tell this guy that the last thing keeping gays away from him is beads

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 5:49 am
by kalm
I love Grandpa Pat!

Christian Broadcasting Network host Pat Robertson told viewers on Monday that Buddhism was like a “disease” and that Christians could get “infected” if their coworkers practiced it.

“I work in an environment where all of my coworkers are Buddhists,” a viewer named Tina explained in an email to Robertson. “They talk about Buddhism all day long and try to preach to me. It didn’t matter much to be before, but since I recommitted myself to Jesus a year ago, it has started to bother me a lot.”

Robertson replied by noting that “healthy” people might not contract a “mild contagion.”
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2015/03/pat- ... ted-by-it/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 6:56 am
by Pwns
I don't want a satanistic Wiccan method to keep the gay away. :tothehand:

The only way to avoid the gay is through Christ.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 9:20 am
by Ursus A. Horribilis
Pwns wrote:I don't want a satanistic Wiccan method to keep the gay away. :tothehand:

The only way to avoid the gay is through Christ.
No, it isn't the only way. Religion is bullshit and I ain't poking dicks in my mouth so it has nothing to do with that.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 10:27 am
by Pwns
Ursus A. Horribilis wrote:
Pwns wrote:I don't want a satanistic Wiccan method to keep the gay away. :tothehand:

The only way to avoid the gay is through Christ.
No, it isn't the only way. Religion is bullshit and I ain't poking dicks in my mouth so it has nothing to do with that.
I'm being sarcastic, Ursus.

I think there's something funny about a televangelist ascribing heterosexuality to a necklace rather than prayer.

If a fundamentalist parent took their gay kid to a pray the gay away camp and one of the counselors gave their kid an inanimate object that's supposed to help prevent and cure gayness the parents would pitch a fit and would say that camp is promoting pagan devil worship.

I may be religious, but I like to have my laughs at the expense of fundies and fanatics just like most people.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 11:44 am
by 89Hen
D1B wrote:Religion. :dunce:
What's your excuse? :coffee:

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 12:14 pm
by dbackjon
Ursus A. Horribilis wrote:
Pwns wrote:I don't want a satanistic Wiccan method to keep the gay away. :tothehand:

The only way to avoid the gay is through Christ.
No, it isn't the only way. Religion is bullshit and I ain't poking dicks in my mouth so it has nothing to do with that.
This is true. I tried everything I could think of to get into Ursus' pants, but got rejected every time.

Beer - didn't work. I put on fake tata's - Ursus knew the difference. I tried roofies - still didn't work.

Only thing that got a glimmer of recognition was when I put on a kilt.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 12:17 pm
by Baldy
kalm wrote:I love Grandpa Pat!

Christian Broadcasting Network host Pat Robertson told viewers on Monday that Buddhism was like a “disease” and that Christians could get “infected” if their coworkers practiced it.

“I work in an environment where all of my coworkers are Buddhists,” a viewer named Tina explained in an email to Robertson. “They talk about Buddhism all day long and try to preach to me. It didn’t matter much to be before, but since I recommitted myself to Jesus a year ago, it has started to bother me a lot.”

Robertson replied by noting that “healthy” people might not contract a “mild contagion.”
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2015/03/pat- ... ted-by-it/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Pat makes me laugh. :lol:
Please tell me this shit is on youtube or something.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 1:14 pm
by Ursus A. Horribilis
Pwns wrote:
Ursus A. Horribilis wrote: No, it isn't the only way. Religion is bullshit and I ain't poking dicks in my mouth so it has nothing to do with that.
I'm being sarcastic, Ursus.

I think there's something funny about a televangelist ascribing heterosexuality to a necklace rather than prayer.

If a fundamentalist parent took their gay kid to a pray the gay away camp and one of the counselors gave their kid an inanimate object that's supposed to help prevent and cure gayness the parents would pitch a fit and would say that camp is promoting pagan devil worship.

I may be religious, but I like to have my laughs at the expense of fundies and fanatics just like most people.
Ah, sorry man, didn't pick up on that one at all. :oops:

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:38 am
by CAA Flagship
dbackjon wrote:
Ursus A. Horribilis wrote: No, it isn't the only way. Religion is bullshit and I ain't poking dicks in my mouth so it has nothing to do with that.
This is true. I tried everything I could think of to get into Ursus' pants, but got rejected every time.

Beer - didn't work. I put on fake tata's - Ursus knew the difference. I tried roofies - still didn't work.

Only thing that got a glimmer of recognition was when I put on a kilt.
:lol: :lol:

Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 10:42 am
by Ibanez
CID1990 wrote:Someone needs to tell this guy that the last thing keeping gays away from him is beads
Wow. I can't imagine spending so much of my left hating and thinking of crazy bullshit like gay repellant beads.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 11:08 am
by kalm
dbackjon wrote:
Ursus A. Horribilis wrote: No, it isn't the only way. Religion is bullshit and I ain't poking dicks in my mouth so it has nothing to do with that.
This is true. I tried everything I could think of to get into Ursus' pants, but got rejected every time.

Beer - didn't work. I put on fake tata's - Ursus knew the difference. I tried roofies - still didn't work.

Only thing that got a glimmer of recognition was when I put on a kilt.
Now I know what to wear to Missoula this year. I'll be sure and iron a crease into the kilt for good measure too.

Thanks for the tip!

(No homo)

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 1:30 pm
by Brock Landers
We need a weekly Pat thread

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 4:09 pm
by Ursus A. Horribilis
It's nice to be wanted.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 4:52 pm
by Grizalltheway
It's also better to give than to receive. Don't let dback convince you otherwise.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 5:34 pm
by JohnStOnge
You would think that HE would use the term "homosexual." The fact that he uses the term "gay" shows that HE has succumbed to some extent to the intense propaganda/thought control campaign.

It's "homosexual." When someone says "gay," you know they've been programed to some extent.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 5:37 pm
by JohnStOnge
I do like one of the pictures underneath the story. Pat, if you're worried about succumbing to homosexuality, just look at this:

Image

If you're a guy and you'd rather touch another guy than touch that, you're sick and I doubt that there's anything a necklace can do for you.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:05 pm
by Brock Landers
Don't knock it til you've tried it John

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:10 pm
by Brock Landers
JohnStOnge wrote:You would think that HE would use the term "homosexual." The fact that he uses the term "gay" shows that HE has succumbed to some extent to the intense propaganda/thought control campaign.

It's "homosexual." When someone says "gay," you know they've been programed to some extent.
Yes, I hate things that "program" people. Not religion, but all those other things.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:19 pm
by kalm
Brock Landers wrote:
JohnStOnge wrote:You would think that HE would use the term "homosexual." The fact that he uses the term "gay" shows that HE has succumbed to some extent to the intense propaganda/thought control campaign.

It's "homosexual." When someone says "gay," you know they've been programed to some extent.
Yes, I hate things that "program" people. Not religion, but all those other things.
:notworthy:
:clap:
:rofl:

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:19 pm
by kalm
Brock Landers wrote:
JohnStOnge wrote:You would think that HE would use the term "homosexual." The fact that he uses the term "gay" shows that HE has succumbed to some extent to the intense propaganda/thought control campaign.

It's "homosexual." When someone says "gay," you know they've been programed to some extent.
Yes, I hate things that "program" people. Not religion, but all those other things.
.

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:28 pm
by houndawg
Brock Landers wrote:
JohnStOnge wrote:You would think that HE would use the term "homosexual." The fact that he uses the term "gay" shows that HE has succumbed to some extent to the intense propaganda/thought control campaign.

It's "homosexual." When someone says "gay," you know they've been programed to some extent.
Yes, I hate things that "program" people. Not religion, but all those other things.
Oh, that had to hurt.... Triple snap...

Back to you John. :laugh: :loser:

Re: Get Your Beads Today

Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2015 9:06 am
by Ursus A. Horribilis
Grizalltheway wrote:It's also better to give than to receive. Don't let dback convince you otherwise.
Done, thanks for the tip.



:D