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Funny story. Last election day, I had to take the kids to the dentist so I took off work in the morning. After a thoroughly boring trip to the dentist (one of those pediatric centered dentist places - lots of toys and kids videos playing - plus they give them a gist bag at the end - very odd, but a different topic for a different day) I'm taking the kids home before going to work and I decide to swing by the township building so I can vote. Obviously, no national races last November, being an off year, so it's just a whole bunch of local offices - school board, township offices, tax collector, etc. We go through the ballot and I have all three boys with me in the booth picking names we either know or just spreading around the votes. So we end up getting down to "Township Auditor" and there's no names registered for either party. I say, "hey, let's write my name in as a write-in vote". We do that, cast the votes, and that's that.

Fast forward to just before Thanksgiving, I get a letter in the mail from the county board of elections - apparently, it's a tie (my littlest one loves this, he instantly channels his inner-Lin Manuel Miranda and goes to the Election of 1800 song from "Hamilton") and they cast lots at high noon the day after Thanksgiving. I'm of course busy coaching multiple kids sports teams, so I don't go. Turns out 7 other people wrote their names in so it was a 7 way tie. So 7 votes cast in an election where about 2500 people voted.

Fast forward to sometime before Christmas, and my wife calls me after getting the mail. There's a big envelope in the mail and wouldn't ya know it, it's a fancy form from the electoral board that I won. I quickly look up Township auditor in the PA state code to find out what they do - it's a 6 year term, I get paid $10 an hour, I have subpoena power, but basically in this kind of a township (i.e. a populated one) there's an outside auditing firm and the role is somewhat ceremonial.

So today, I go to the Township building, I get sworn in (a real swearing in, bible and everything. I officially now have pledged to defend the US Constitution!) and I'm officially a Township Auditor. My first elected position. I know have a story to tell at parties for years to come.

I love democracy.

GannonFan wrote:Funny story. Last election day, I had to take the kids to the dentist so I took off work in the morning. After a thoroughly boring trip to the dentist (one of those pediatric centered dentist places - lots of toys and kids videos playing - plus they give them a gist bag at the end - very odd, but a different topic for a different day) I'm taking the kids home before going to work and I decide to swing by the township building so I can vote. Obviously, no national races last November, being an off year, so it's just a whole bunch of local offices - school board, township offices, tax collector, etc. We go through the ballot and I have all three boys with me in the booth picking names we either know or just spreading around the votes. So we end up getting down to "Township Auditor" and there's no names registered for either party. I say, "hey, let's write my name in as a write-in vote". We do that, cast the votes, and that's that.

Fast forward to just before Thanksgiving, I get a letter in the mail from the county board of elections - apparently, it's a tie (my littlest one loves this, he instantly channels his inner-Lin Manuel Miranda and goes to the Election of 1800 song from "Hamilton") and they cast lots at high noon the day after Thanksgiving. I'm of course busy coaching multiple kids sports teams, so I don't go. Turns out 7 other people wrote their names in so it was a 7 way tie. So 7 votes cast in an election where about 2500 people voted.

Fast forward to sometime before Christmas, and my wife calls me after getting the mail. There's a big envelope in the mail and wouldn't ya know it, it's a fancy form from the electoral board that I won. I quickly look up Township auditor in the PA state code to find out what they do - it's a 6 year term, I get paid $10 an hour, I have subpoena power, but basically in this kind of a township (i.e. a populated one) there's an outside auditing firm and the role is somewhat ceremonial.

So today, I go to the Township building, I get sworn in (a real swearing in, bible and everything. I officially now have pledged to defend the US Constitution!) and I'm officially a Township Auditor. My first elected position. I know have a story to tell at parties for years to come.

Welcome to the world of being an elected official. Use your power wisely (or at least use it to get rich)!

Can you fix a parking ticket for me???

You should be able to find a way to make some money over 6 years.

Congrats!

First Township Auditor, next, the White House!

GannonFan = Swamp Monster

Great...another pro-establishment conk in office...

Spoiler: show

this is kind of awesome. Congrats!

You totally need to channel your inner Gilbert & Sullivan and go all Lord High Executioner at your first Township meeting...

Spoiler: show

And good lord man, you need to "accidently" leave an old Playboy in your kid's bathroom just to get you son [SON] back on track...

Can you get pot holes fixed? I have one that need filling. It's called Idaho!

Nice job, Ganny! And you can still straddle that center stripe....

Cool, you must keep us informed of how it goes.


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Great story Gannon!

Next step is to create the Gannon Foundation in which you take contributions from local businesses to look the other way on certain audits and regulations...and keep all your files on a server in your bathroom and deny any intent of wrong doing. JSO would certainly approve and proclaim you to be the most moral and competent township auditor of all time.

Congrats!! You'll have to look up where you rank in the line of succession in case the Designated Survivor scenario plays out!

bluehenbillk wrote:Congrats!! You'll have to look up where you rank in the line of succession in case the Designated Survivor scenario plays out!

1,234,666th

I'm already being encouraged to do something with a bit more meat in it - possibly a seat on the local Water Authority Board (as a township representative - multiple townships share the same local Water Authority) or a plumb job on the Local Sewer Authority. Now that would be almost literally getting into the swamp! My wife is being sought after for a spot on the Parks Commission board so we could turn into a power couple, locally speaking of course. However, if this is how JSO and his wife started I'll have to put the brakes on this right away.

GannonFan wrote:I'm already being encouraged to do something with a bit more meat in it - possibly a seat on the local Water Authority Board (as a township representative - multiple townships share the same local Water Authority) or a plumb job on the Local Sewer Authority. Now that would be almost literally getting into the swamp! My wife is being sought after for a spot on the Parks Commission board so we could turn into a power couple, locally speaking of course. However, if this is how JSO and his wife started I'll have to put the brakes on this right away.

Plum

But plumb is funnier!

GannonFan wrote:I'm already being encouraged to do something with a bit more meat in it - possibly a seat on the local Water Authority Board (as a township representative - multiple townships share the same local Water Authority) or a plumb job on the Local Sewer Authority. Now that would be almost literally getting into the swamp! My wife is being sought after for a spot on the Parks Commission board so we could turn into a power couple, locally speaking of course. However, if this is how JSO and his wife started I'll have to put the brakes on this right away.

Vote GannonFan! The beating heart of the administrative state!

Ivytalk wrote:

GannonFan wrote:I'm already being encouraged to do something with a bit more meat in it - possibly a seat on the local Water Authority Board (as a township representative - multiple townships share the same local Water Authority) or a plumb job on the Local Sewer Authority. Now that would be almost literally getting into the swamp! My wife is being sought after for a spot on the Parks Commission board so we could turn into a power couple, locally speaking of course. However, if this is how JSO and his wife started I'll have to put the brakes on this right away.

Plum

But plumb is funnier!

GannonFan wrote:I'm already being encouraged to do something with a bit more meat in it - possibly a seat on the local Water Authority Board (as a township representative - multiple townships share the same local Water Authority) or a plumb job on the Local Sewer Authority. Now that would be almost literally getting into the swamp! My wife is being sought after for a spot on the Parks Commission board so we could turn into a power couple, locally speaking of course. However, if this is how JSO and his wife started I'll have to put the brakes on this right away.

Please refer to her with the appropriate title: First Lady

CAA Flagship wrote:

GannonFan wrote:I'm already being encouraged to do something with a bit more meat in it - possibly a seat on the local Water Authority Board (as a township representative - multiple townships share the same local Water Authority) or a plumb job on the Local Sewer Authority. Now that would be almost literally getting into the swamp! My wife is being sought after for a spot on the Parks Commission board so we could turn into a power couple, locally speaking of course. However, if this is how JSO and his wife started I'll have to put the brakes on this right away.

Please refer to her with the appropriate title: First Lady

We did joke about having some kind of party after I got sworn in, something where we'd ask everyone to wear really fancy clothes and treat it like an inaugural.

I hear there's some guys from Jersey that want to talk to you about the street and garbage contracts.

So let me get this straight-

youre the guy that makes sure the money is accounted for and spent the way it was supposed to be?



does your wife know about this?


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