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Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:55 am**

As of press time, Welker had not made a single friend at Massachusetts General. Although the wideout's attitude has been celebrated by sportswriters and fans alike as scrappy and overachieving, hospital personnel have described him as "exhausting," "intolerable," and "the most infuriating little cocksucker ever to walk God's green earth."
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/ev ... eady_hates

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 8:14 am**

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 9:27 am**

"I consider myself a very patient person," hospital janitor Mike Clemens said. "But Mr. Welker has pushed me to my limit. He told me that my mopping routes were sloppy, and that if I maybe showed a little more heart out there I could get a few more crucial feet out of each swab."

"What a prick," Clemens added. "Seriously, what a fucking little prick."

Sad. Just.....sad.

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 9:28 am**

I thought it was Hank Scorpio's job to cruise The Onion?

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 3:11 pm**

AZGrizFan wrote:I thought it was Hank Scorpio's job to cruise The Onion?

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 3:14 pm**

hank scorpio wrote:
AZGrizFan wrote:I thought it was Hank Scorpio's job to cruise The Onion?

Slacker.

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Everyone At Hospital Already Hates Wes Welker..

Everyone At Hospital Already Hates Wes Welker..

Re: Everyone At Hospital Already Hates Wes Welker..

Re: Everyone At Hospital Already Hates Wes Welker..

Re: Everyone At Hospital Already Hates Wes Welker..

Re: Everyone At Hospital Already Hates Wes Welker..

Re: Everyone At Hospital Already Hates Wes Welker..