Brad Marchand Wikipedia Page

[UNHWildCats]

Someone posted this on his wikipedia, it has since been changed back, but remains available in the page history.



Personal

Along with Stanley Cup Champion, Brad Marchand also goes by the nickname of the Nose Face KIllah. Viva La Stool!

He has been laying pipe all over Boston since winning the Stanley Cup.

Brad Marchand is the rebirth of Baby Jesus.[3]

He has been known to enter a bar, grab a drink, and then immediately remove his shirt.

After his epic performance at foxwooods resort and casino he is now the spokesperson of 5 Hour Energy and extenze.

He once scored a goal off of his nose, thus making Max Pacioretty look like an idiot.

Brad Marchand once put out a fire using only gasoline.

He once was paid by multiple hookers to have sex with them. All three became pregnant and each gave birth to the father, son, and Holy Spirit. God and Jesus Christ, the originals, were confused. But Brad explained they were to rule the Earth together- and they did. Original Jesus smiled, patted Brad on the shoulder and thanked him. It was the seventh time Jesus thanked Brad for something.

He once inserted his nose into the box of one of the Sedin Sisters.

He was asked to be the spokesman for Dos Equis but instead decided to win the Stanley Cup.

It has been rumored that Marchand will retire from the NHL to become a bartender at Club Shrine in Foxwoods. He has asked Shrine management to be paid in bottles of Grey Goose and 12 packs of Bud Light instead of cash.

[Grizalltheway]

Douche canoe.

[Big McLargehuge]

Nothing will ever match what happened to Gary Roberts' page shortly after he became a Penguin.

Or better yet, the way it turned on John Fedko (local sports guy for one of the channels, who complained about it...and saw his Wikipedia page turned into a Roberts shrine that basically caused him to meltdown on the air).