How would YOU fix the Gulf Oil Spill?

[JohnStOnge]

Nuke it.

Exactly what I thought when I saw the title of this thread. Basically what you've got is a narrow channel through the material at the bottom of the Gulf. I think if you just put a nuke a little bit above the opening and set it off it would fuse the channel shut. It's not like the reservoir the oil is coming from is right there under the surface so that setting off a nuke would blast it open. And you'd be setting the nuke off a mile under water. So there'd be a little bit of radiation. There wouldn't be any fallout. We've had underwater nuke tests before and everything turned out fine.
There's a treaty banning underwater nuclear tests now but this wouldn't be a test. This would be an application. Yep. Nuke it.

[Skjellyfetti]

And if the nuclear blast tears a hole in the reservoir that no relief well could counter-act? And the whole fucking reservoir leaks out into the Gulf?

[dbackjon]

How deep below the surface of the land is the oil?

[bobbythekidd]

And if the nuclear blast tears a hole in the reservoir that no relief well could counter-act? And the whole fucking reservoir leaks out into the Gulf?

Jeebus that would be awesome! We would have discovered the fastest way to extrude mass quantities of oil from otherwise hard to get places! It's the high-tech equivalent of a redneck fishing with dynamite.

All we have to do is do the same thing on land and sop it up like a biscuit lapping up gravy.

[griz37]

And if the nuclear blast tears a hole in the reservoir that no relief well could counter-act? And the whole fucking reservoir leaks out into the Gulf?

Jeebus that would be awesome! We would have discovered the fastest way to extrude mass quantities of oil from otherwise hard to get places! It's the high-tech equivalent of a redneck fishing with dynamite.

All we have to do is do the same thing on land and sop it up like a biscuit lapping up gravy.

Then we'd have a good reason to nuke all those useless Middle Eastern countries.

[Skjellyfetti]

How deep below the surface of the land is the oil?

Are you talking about the sea floor? It wouldn't surprise me in the least if BP were the only ones that knew the answer to that.

[93henfan]

Could taunting work?

Let us taunt it! It may become so cross that it will make a mistake.

[AZGrizFan]

How deep below the surface of the land is the oil?

Are you talking about the sea floor? It wouldn't surprise me in the least if BP were the only ones that knew the answer to that.

about 30,000 feet.

[∞∞∞]

To be honest, I was just being somewhat sarcastic about nuking it. No doubt it's an interesting theory, but if you really think and read about it, it's not a very viable solution no matter how successful the Russians were. I'd go on, but I'm too lazy right now to type a diatribe about why.

[houndawg]

Nuke it.

Big downside for BP - no more oil well.

OTOH, if we let the well continue to spew an Olympic swimming pool worth of oil into the Gulf every few minutes for several months, there might still be some money to be made. Provided of course that the cost of cleaning up is passed on to the taxpayers.