A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

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A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Cap'n Cat »

....and travelinman.

(Adapted from "A Day In The Life" by Douglas Amy, Professor of Politics at Mount Holyoke College)

http://www.governmentisgood.com/articles.php?aid=1&p=3

Though we usually fail to notice it, government programs and policies improve our daily lives in innumerable ways.

Ask yourself this question: “What has government done for me lately?” If you are like most Americans, you will probably answer: “Not much.” Many people feel like they pay a lot in taxes but don't really get anything back from government. Surveys show that 52% of Americans believe that “government programs have not really helped me and my family.”

But let’s see if that is really true. Let’s examine a typical day in the life of an average middle-class dork named AZGrizFan and try to identify some of the ways that government improves that person’s life during that 24-hour period.

:nod: :nod: :nod: :nod: :nod: :nod: :nod: :nod:

6:30 a.m. Z is awakened by his clock radio and he listens for a few minutes to the news before getting up. But you can listen to your favorite station only because the Federal Communications Commission brings organization and coherence to our vast telecommunications system. It ensures, for example, that radio stations do not overlap and that stations signals are not interfered with by the numerous other devices – cell phones, satellite television, wireless computers, etc. – whose signals crowd our nation’s airwaves.

6:35 a.m. Like 17 million other Americans, you have asthma. But as you get out of bed you notice that you are breathing freely this morning. This is thanks in part to government clean air laws that reduce the air pollution that would otherwise greatly worsen your condition.

6:38 a.m. You go into the kitchen for breakfast. You pour some water into your coffeemaker. You simply take for granted that this water is safe to drink. But in fact you count on your city water department to constantly monitor the quality of your water and to immediately take measures to correct any potential problems with this vital resource.

6:39 a.m. You flip the switch on the coffee maker. There is no short in the outlet or in the electrical line and there is no resulting fire in your house. Why? Because when your house was being built, the electrical system had to be inspected to make sure it was properly installed – a service provided by your local government. And it was installed by an electrician who was licensed by your state government to ensure his competence and your safety.

6:45 a.m. You sit down to breakfast with your family. You are having eggs – a food that brings with it the possibility of salmonella poisoning, a serious food-borne illness affecting tens of thousands of Americans every year. But the chance of you getting sick from these eggs has now been greatly reduced by a recently passed series of strict federal rules that apply to egg producers.

7:00 a.m. You go into your newly renovated bathroom – one of a number of amenities that you enjoy in your house. But the fact that you can even own your own house is something made possible by government. Think about this: “ownership” and “private property” are not things that exist in nature. These are legal constructs: things created by laws that are passed and enforced by government. You couldn’t even buy your home without a system of commercial laws concerning contracts and a government that ensures that sales contracts are enforced. So the fact that you live in your own home is, in part, a benefit of government and the rule of law.

7:01 a.m. Government also helps you own your house in more than the legal sense. On a more practical level, the federal government actually gives you money every year to help pay for your house. It’s called a mortgage interest tax deduction and it is one of the larger benefit programs run by the federal government – amounting to over $60 billion dollars a year. You can also deduct any real estate taxes you pay. These largely overlooked subsidy programs have enabled millions of people to buy their first home or to move up to a larger home than they could afford otherwise.

7:02 a.m. Back in the bathroom. You use the toilet and flush it. Your local government then takes care of transporting this waste, treating it, and disposing of it in an environmentally responsible manner – all without a second thought by you.

7:20 a.m. As you are getting dressed, a glance outside the window shows some ominous clouds. You check the weather on your TV. All these weather forecasts are made possible by information gathered and analyzed by the National Weather Service, a government agency. Everyday, on your behalf, it takes in 190,000 weather observations from surface stations, 2,700 from ships, 115,000 from aircraft, 18,000 for buoys, 250,000 from balloons, and 140 million from satellites – all just to help you plan what to wear and make sure you don’t get stuck in a snow storm. And oh yes, this agency may save your life with its hurricane and tornado warnings.

7:30 a.m. Before you leave home, you take your pills to control your high blood pressure. But how do you know that this medicine is safe or effective? Without the testing required by the Food and Drug Administration, you wouldn’t. And without the vigilance of the FDA, you could easily fall victim to unscrupulous marketers of unsafe and worthless medicines.

7:45 a.m. You put a couple of letters in your mailbox. For less than the price of a cup of coffee, a government employee will come to your house, pick up the letters, and have them delivered in a few days to someone on the other side of the country. A pretty good deal.

7:50 a.m. You and your child walk across the lawn to your car and arrive without getting dog poop on your shoes. A small but welcome achievement that is made possible now by a local law that requires people to clean up after their pets. Also, the reason your neighborhood is not plagued by stray cats and dogs is that your local Animal Control officer is on the job dealing with this constant problem.

7:52 a.m. You help your young child into your car and you pull out of your driveway. You have now entered an experience that is improved by government in almost more ways that you can count. Driving your car is inherently dangerous. But it is made immensely safer by government laws and regulations, such as those mandating child safety seats and the use of seat belts – rules that have saved tens of thousands of lives. Driving down the street is also made much safer by a local government that enforces traffic laws and discourages people from driving too fast or driving drunk. Most state governments also minimize your risk of being run into by someone driving on bald tires or with faulty breaks by requiring regular inspections of all vehicles. And state drivers license examinations ensure that all drivers are at least minimally competent and can actually see the road. In addition, if you are hit by another car, the potentially disastrous costs of an accident are covered because the government requires that all drivers to have auto insurance. In fact, without this extensive network of government laws and regulations covering automobiles and driving, it would be foolish for us to ever venture out on the road.

8:15 a.m. You drop your child off at day-care. It took a long search to find a good program and it is an expensive one, but it is worth it so you can feel confident that your child is in a safe, nurturing, and stimulating environment while you are at work. One of the reasons you can afford this program is the $3,000 child care tax credit you get from the federal government every year. Equally important, your child benefits from the fact that most state governments now enforce day-care requirements for group size, ratios of children per staff member, teacher training, nutrition, health, safety, and space requirements.

8:35 a.m. Your trip on the freeway is much safer due to federal restrictions on the number of hours that truck drivers can operate their vehicles without resting. Thousands of people die every year from truck-related traffic accidents, but it would be much worse without these regulations that keep sleepy truck drivers off the road.


8:55 a.m. You arrive at work and take the elevator. You just assume that the elevator is safe; and it is, thanks in part to the annual elevator inspections conducted by your state government. It is probably nothing you will appreciate until the next time the elevator breaks down with you inside, and that makes you think a bit more about the reliability of elevators.

9:00 a.m. While at work, your rights and wellbeing are constantly protected by a wide-ranging network of federal and state laws. The Occupation Safety and Health Act works to protect you from unsafe and unhealthy work conditions. Federal law protects you from workplace discrimination based on race, gender, religion, national origin, or disability. State laws may also require your employer to purchase worker’s compensation insurance so that you are covered in case you are injured on the job


Noon. For lunch you have your usual sandwich and microwaveable cup of soup. But why did you choose that particular soup? Perhaps because it was low in salt and fat. But how do you know that? Because the government requires all food packaging to have a truthful and easily readable panel on the label that supplies you with the nutritional information necessary to make a good choice. Food companies tell you what they want you to know about their products, but the Food and Drug Administration’s labeling requirements tell you what you need to know to eat in a healthy way.

How do you know the lettuce in your sandwich is not laced with unhealthy doses of pesticides? Because the Department of Agriculture has developed and is enforcing uniform standards for pesticide residue on raw foods.


Microwave ovens are potentially very dangerous machines, but you can use this one with confidence because of detailed government regulations that limit the maximum amount of radiation leakage and mandate two different safety interlocks that prevent its operation with the door ajar or open.

12:45 p.m. After lunch, you walk to a nearby ATM and get some cash out of your account – and your money is actually there. That wasn't always true during the economic depression of the 1930s when many banks failed. But your money is safe -- as it was during the recent financial and banking crisis -- because the government guarantees your deposits. In addition, those pieces of paper you put in your wallet are only worth something thanks to the federal government. Our monetary system is entirely a government creation, and the value of money is only maintained because the government regulates the money supply and protects it from counterfeiters. Quite an important service really.


1:00 p.m. Back at work you hear rumors about a new downsizing plan being talked about by management – a fairly typical occurrence in these days of heightened national and international corporate competition. You know your job is one that could be lost, but you also know that you will be eligible for state-mandated unemployment insurance should that happen. This is just another way that government helps you to cope with the economic risks and uncertainties of a modern economy.

3:00 p.m. On a break, you call your elderly mother in the hospital to check on how she is recovering from her broken hip. Thanks to Medicare, her medical expenses are covered and she does not have to worry about this becoming a financial disaster for her. Thanks to the federal Family and Medical Leave act, you will also have the right to take several days off to tend to your mother when she comes home from the hospital.

3:10 p.m. You call to arrange for a physical therapist to work with your mother when she comes out of the hospital, and again this is paid for by Medicare. And you can be reasonably confident that she will get good therapy because your state Department of Health has a program of examining and licensing these therapists in order to ensure the quality of their work.

5:00 p.m. You leave work—thanks to the government-mandated 40-hour workweek. Labor Department regulations prevent your company from making you work past 5:00 unless it pays you overtime.

5:15 p.m. You stop at a local gas station to fill up. The very fact that this oil company offers this gas to you for sale is dependent on the existence of certain government laws. This company would not do business in your town without a legal system that assures them that you will pay for any gas you pump into your car. This economic exchange – like buying your house – would not be taking place without a system of statutory and common law that protects private property and regulates sales transactions. This simple sale is covered by Article Two of the Uniform Commercial Code – dozens of pages of laws that regulate every phase of a transaction for the sale of goods and provide remedies for problems that may arise.

5:15 p.m. You pump 15 gallons of 87 octane gas into your car and pay for it. But how do you know that you really got 15 gallons, and not 14½? And that the gas was actually 87 octane? This is only ensured by the presence of that little sticker on the gas pump that shows that a worker from your city’s Division of Weights and Measures has inspected the pump and the gas. These public employees make sure that you get what you pay for – from a pound of sliced turkey breast to a carat of diamond – by constantly testing and inspecting all commercial meters and scales, and by verifying the accuracy of checkout scanners. This is a crucial service, since more than half of the income of the average family is used to purchase necessities bought by weight or measure or scanned at a checkout station.

5:15 p.m. How do you know the price you are paying for this gasoline is a fair and competitive one? In many states, the Department of Attorney General has been responsible for finding and prosecuting cases of price manipulation and price fixing by oil companies and distributors.

5:30 p.m. As you drive home, you notice the tree-lined streets and the nice houses in your neighborhood – generally a pretty good place to live. Thanks again to government. Without zoning rules, you might have an auto body shop or a fast-food outlet move in next door. Or worse yet, a fertilizer plant or a toxic waste site. But there are no noxious smells in the air, no excessive and dangerous traffic on your street – thanks to your government. Pleasant and livable neighborhoods are only possible with extensive government planning and zoning regulation.

5:35 p.m. As you approach your house, you see your child coming down the sidewalk. The government-provided sidewalk. The sidewalk that allows your child to walk to the neighbor’s house down the street to play with a friend without the risk of being hit by a car.

5:45 p.m. You go for a jog in your local public park.

6:30 p.m. You take your family out for dinner at a local pizza restaurant. You enjoy a good meal and no one gets sick from E. coli or other food-borne illnesses. This is in large part because your local government conducts regular inspections of all food establishments as well as thosde of its ingredient providers.

7:30 p.m. Back at your house. You settle in for a quiet evening at home – one that is undisturbed by those annoying telemarketers calling you up to try to sell you something. This is because you have signed up with a state or federal no-call registry – a government service now enjoyed by over 60 million Americans.

8:00 p.m. You do a quick check of your e-mail – just one of the many services you enjoy over the internet everyday. We all tend to think of the internet as the product of those talented and imaginative entrepreneurs in the high-tech companies. But the internet actually began with government programs that created ARPANET and later NSFNET, early computer networking systems that developed the software and networking infrastructure that form the foundations of today’s internet. The government also helped to fund research that led to web browsers like Internet Explorer and search engines like Google.

8:45 pm. You masturbate to a hot interracial video and are able to do so because of the freedoms granted to you by your governemnt, who chooses not to censor the Internet.

11:00 p.m. You go to bed. During your sleep, you are protected by a smoke detector that your city requires to be installed in every residence. Maybe you would have bought one of these yourself, but this law helps to ensure that everyone is protected from the dangers of fire. Nevermind the government-mandated fire-retardant requirement for your kids' sleepwear.

4:00 a.m. You are asleep in your comfy bed. Unlike that time you stayed in a small inn in Costa Rica, where you were woken up regularly at 4 in the morning by the roosters crowing in the neighborhood. By law, no one can keep roosters in your neighborhood and so you remain in blissful slumber.

Goverment is good, people.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Col Hogan »

Government is good....but in it's proper place...

The Constitution outlines what the Federal Government is responsible for...and the feds should be doing those things...

Everything else is left to the states...and the states should be doing their stuff...

It's all good...except where the feds try to do stuff the states should be doing, like education, health care, etc...

Or where the feds are not doing things that are their responsibility, like immigration policy and enforcement...

So, I don't disagree with you, Cap, that government is good...Just in it's proper place...according to the laws of our land... :nod:
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Cap'n Cat »

We disagree on the Feds thing, but I'd still blow you.

The federal government isn't out to get anyone. It's all Conk-created mania designed to create hysteria.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Ursus A. Horribilis »

Oh good now Cap'n is doing the chain political emails too.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Cap'n Cat »

Ursus A. Horribilis wrote:Oh good now Cap'n is doing the chain political emails too.

It ain't a chain, bitch. It's just an infomative essay. Read or don't read it.

:shake: :coffee:
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Ursus A. Horribilis »

Cap'n Cat wrote:
Ursus A. Horribilis wrote:Oh good now Cap'n is doing the chain political emails too.

It ain't a chain, bitch. It's just an infomative essay. Read or don't read it.

:shake: :coffee:
It is a chain or at least real close to a chain that was titled "Jim get up in the morning" that I received a couple of years ago. I saw it posted on AGS a while later and I think it was blueballs that did a FIFY on the person that posted it that was pretty damn funny. I did read it and it has substance.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Cap'n Cat »

I don't believe you, so fvck off.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by UNI88 »

Cap'n haven't read the whole thing yet but it's a nice summary of what the various levels of government do for citizens but I disagree with 7:01 a.m. The Government doesn't actually give me money to every year to help pay for my house. They just take less of my money than they otherwise would have.

I think we could do an alternative version of the reasons why some right wing extremists hate the government because they prevent them from using their guns to just go out and take what they want from the less well defended.

I also agree with the Colonel that each level of government has its place.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Cap'n Cat »

UNI88 wrote:Cap'n haven't read the whole thing yet but it's a nice summary of what the various levels of government do for citizens but I disagree with 7:01 a.m. The Government doesn't actually give me money to every year to help pay for my house. They just take less of my money than they otherwise would have.

I think we could do an alternative version of the reasons why some right wing extremists hate the government because they prevent them from using their guns to just go out and take what they want from the less well defended.

I also agree with the Colonel that each level of government has its place.

Good. So? What, you want a fvcking medal?

Reply when you DO read the whole thing.

:coffee:



;)
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by TwinTownBisonFan »

Ursus A. Horribilis wrote:
Cap'n Cat wrote:

It ain't a chain, bitch. It's just an infomative essay. Read or don't read it.

:shake: :coffee:
It is a chain or at least real close to a chain that was titled "Jim get up in the morning" that I received a couple of years ago. I saw it posted on AGS a while later and I think it was blueballs that did a FIFY on the person that posted it that was pretty damn funny. I did read it and it has substance.
the only difference is, this a legit essay by a government scholar instead of a bunch of race/gay/relgion baiting written by an intern at a DC-based conktank written to sound like it was written by "joe the plumber" nor does it implore you to "forward if you agree that america was better when darkies knew their place and women were barefoot and pregnant and there were no immigrants" (ya know, the time that never existed except in the addled minds of conkus regulus)
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Cap'n Cat »

Reppies, TT, for pointing that out to our young friend. I'm familiar with what he's yapping about and it was NOTHING like this essay.

Ursus, shame.

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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Col Hogan »

Cap'n Cat wrote:We disagree on the Feds thing, but I'd still blow you. .
Ahhh, thank you......I think...

Cap'n Cat wrote:The federal government isn't out to get anyone. It's all Conk-created mania designed to create hysteria.
I don't think I said, or even implied, that the federal government was out to get anybody...are you still hearing those voices in your head, Cap... :mrgreen:
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Cap'n Cat »

I extrapolated and exaggerated, a Conky thing to do, and I apologize wholeheartedly.

Love,

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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by UNI88 »

Cap'n Cat wrote:
UNI88 wrote:Cap'n haven't read the whole thing yet but it's a nice summary of what the various levels of government do for citizens but I disagree with 7:01 a.m. The Government doesn't actually give me money to every year to help pay for my house. They just take less of my money than they otherwise would have.

I think we could do an alternative version of the reasons why some right wing extremists hate the government because they prevent them from using their guns to just go out and take what they want from the less well defended.

I also agree with the Colonel that each level of government has its place.

Good. So? What, you want a fvcking medal?

Reply when you DO read the whole thing.

:coffee:

;)
Just finished it Cappy and I will reemphasize that it was a nice summary of the many srevices that various levels of government provide for people. Out of 30-some points I only disagree with one or two.

Now that I've finished it will you dump out that coffee cup filled with piss and vinigar, pull the tampon out of your sphincter and get me my fvcking medal? :D
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It will probably be difficult for MAQA yahoos to overcome the Qult programming but they should give being rational & reasonable a try.

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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Cap'n Cat »

UNI88 wrote:
Cap'n Cat wrote:

Good. So? What, you want a fvcking medal?

Reply when you DO read the whole thing.

:coffee:

;)
Just finished it Cappy and I will reemphasize that it was a nice summary of the many srevices that various levels of government provide for people. Out of 30-some points I only disagree with one or two.

Now that I've finished it will you dump out that coffee cup filled with piss and vinigar, pull the tampon out of your sphincter and get me my fvcking medal? :D
I was playing with you, 88. I would never shit on a purple guy like that, unless it was clenz.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Ursus A. Horribilis »

Cap'n Cat wrote:I don't believe you, so fvck off.
You have used that line before on things I've posted which were true so I really don't give a fuck what you do or don't believe. It's a very close copy of an email I received a couple of years ago extolling what government does for us and as I said before there is substance to it, i.e. I agree with Col. and you that there are good things done by government to make our everyday lives better. It's too bad that some of you can't just quit looking at everything through your party line blinders and try to see what is really being said instead of what you percieve by looking at the outer crust and conclusion jumping donkafuckinator.



TwinTownBisonFan wrote:
the only difference is, this a legit essay by a government scholar instead of a bunch of race/gay/relgion baiting written by an intern at a DC-based conktank written to sound like it was written by "joe the plumber" nor does it implore you to "forward if you agree that america was better when darkies knew their place and women were barefoot and pregnant and there were no immigrants" (ya know, the time that never existed except in the addled minds of conkus regulus)
It was a liberal leaning piece that had as much race/religion/gay bashing in it as the initial post that Cap'n put up and was the same tone as well so I don't have a clue what your are referring to. You are not a well rounded man politically TTBF or obfective in any way. You are the exact same man as the Conk you ridicule you are just at the other end of the spectrum.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by TwinTownBisonFan »

Ursus A. Horribilis wrote:
Cap'n Cat wrote:I don't believe you, so fvck off.
You have used that line before on things I've posted which were true so I really don't give a fuck what you do or don't believe. It's a very close copy of an email I received a couple of years ago extolling what government does for us and as I said before there is substance to it, i.e. I agree with Col. and you that there are good things done by government to make our everyday lives better. It's too bad that some of you can't just quit looking at everything through your party line blinders and try to see what is really being said instead of what you percieve by looking at the outer crust and conclusion jumping donkafuckinator.



TwinTownBisonFan wrote:
the only difference is, this a legit essay by a government scholar instead of a bunch of race/gay/relgion baiting written by an intern at a DC-based conktank written to sound like it was written by "joe the plumber" nor does it implore you to "forward if you agree that america was better when darkies knew their place and women were barefoot and pregnant and there were no immigrants" (ya know, the time that never existed except in the addled minds of conkus regulus)
It was a liberal leaning piece that had as much race/religion/gay bashing in it as the initial post that Cap'n put up and was the same tone as well so I don't have a clue what your are referring to. You are not a well rounded man politically TTBF or obfective in any way. You are the exact same man as the Conk you ridicule you are just at the other end of the spectrum.
"not well rounded politically"...

dude, I used to work for the GOP (96-99)... was trained by The Leadership Institute and staffed GOP campaigns - for a long time I wanted to work for DCI - the GOP ops firm that produces a lot of those right-wing emails. I know of what I speak, and am very aware of the conk point of view on things... I also think they are wrong...

It's not a matter of not being objective - I can be objective, it's just that once I've looked at something objectively, I form an opinion on it. I think anything worth thinking about is worth forming an opinion on.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by UNI88 »

Cap'n Cat wrote:I was playing with you, 88. I would never **** on a purple guy like that, unless it was clenz.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

:bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow:
:bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow:
:bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow:
I saw the wink so I know you were Cap'n that's why I included the smiley.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Ursus A. Horribilis »

TwinTownBisonFan wrote:
Ursus A. Horribilis wrote: You have used that line before on things I've posted which were true so I really don't give a fuck what you do or don't believe. It's a very close copy of an email I received a couple of years ago extolling what government does for us and as I said before there is substance to it, i.e. I agree with Col. and you that there are good things done by government to make our everyday lives better. It's too bad that some of you can't just quit looking at everything through your party line blinders and try to see what is really being said instead of what you percieve by looking at the outer crust and conclusion jumping donkafuckinator.






It was a liberal leaning piece that had as much race/religion/gay bashing in it as the initial post that Cap'n put up and was the same tone as well so I don't have a clue what your are referring to. You are not a well rounded man politically TTBF or obfective in any way. You are the exact same man as the Conk you ridicule you are just at the other end of the spectrum.
"not well rounded politically"...

dude, I used to work for the GOP (96-99)... was trained by The Leadership Institute and staffed GOP campaigns - for a long time I wanted to work for DCI - the GOP ops firm that produces a lot of those right-wing emails. I know of what I speak, and am very aware of the conk point of view on things... I also think they are wrong...

It's not a matter of not being objective - I can be objective, it's just that once I've looked at something objectively, I form an opinion on it. I think anything worth thinking about is worth forming an opinion on.
Well then we agree on the way to come to an opinion so why did you automatically think that what I was talking about was some conk thinktank thing? I stated right up front that it was very similar to what Cap'n put out...or did I misread what you were saying?
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by AZGrizFan »

6:30 a.m. Z is awakened by his clock radio and he listens for a few minutes to the news before getting up. But you can listen to your favorite station only because the Federal Communications Commission brings organization and coherence to our vast telecommunications system. It ensures, for example, that radio stations do not overlap and that stations signals are not interfered with by the numerous other devices – cell phones, satellite television, wireless computers, etc. – whose signals crowd our nation’s airwaves.

NOPE - Don't use an alarm clock. I am awakened @ 6:05 a.m. every morning by my cat chewing on my penis.

6:35 a.m. Like 17 million other Americans, you have asthma. But as you get out of bed you notice that you are breathing freely this morning. This is thanks in part to government clean air laws that reduce the air pollution that would otherwise greatly worsen your condition.

NOPE - Fit as a fiddle. No health problems here (other than a chaffed penis...)

6:38 a.m. You go into the kitchen for breakfast. You pour some water into your coffeemaker. You simply take for granted that this water is safe to drink. But in fact you count on your city water department to constantly monitor the quality of your water and to immediately take measures to correct any potential problems with this vital resource.

WRONG AGAIN - I never touch coffee---it's the Devil's drink. I only drink Diet Coke (from a bottle, made in Mexico). :coffee:

6:39 a.m. You flip the switch on the coffee maker. There is no short in the outlet or in the electrical line and there is no resulting fire in your house. Why? Because when your house was being built, the electrical system had to be inspected to make sure it was properly installed – a service provided by your local government. And it was installed by an electrician who was licensed by your state government to ensure his competence and your safety.

EL STUPIDO---How naive. I rewired my entire house MYSELF after your "state licensed electrician" did it with his head stuffed WAAAAAAY up his ass, apparently.

6:45 a.m. You sit down to breakfast with your family. You are having eggs – a food that brings with it the possibility of salmonella poisoning, a serious food-borne illness affecting tens of thousands of Americans every year. But the chance of you getting sick from these eggs has now been greatly reduced by a recently passed series of strict federal rules that apply to egg producers.

:lol: :lol: :lol: I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast....not eggs.

7:00 a.m. You go into your newly renovated bathroom – one of a number of amenities that you enjoy in your house. But the fact that you can even own your own house is something made possible by government. Think about this: “ownership” and “private property” are not things that exist in nature. These are legal constructs: things created by laws that are passed and enforced by government. You couldn’t even buy your home without a system of commercial laws concerning contracts and a government that ensures that sales contracts are enforced. So the fact that you live in your own home is, in part, a benefit of government and the rule of law.

YEP - RENOVATED BY ME. And "ownership" and "private property" concepts will be a thing of the past under your partie's "leadership". :roll: :roll:

7:01 a.m. Government also helps you own your house in more than the legal sense. On a more practical level, the federal government actually gives you money every year to help pay for your house. It’s called a mortgage interest tax deduction and it is one of the larger benefit programs run by the federal government – amounting to over $60 billion dollars a year. You can also deduct any real estate taxes you pay. These largely overlooked subsidy programs have enabled millions of people to buy their first home or to move up to a larger home than they could afford otherwise.

Let me get this straight: I pay 35% of my income to support slugs like YOU, and I'm supposed to bow down in thanks because they give a sliver of it BACK to me because I support the local housing economy? I laugh at your "logic"....

7:02 a.m. Back in the bathroom. You use the toilet and flush it. Your local government then takes care of transporting this waste, treating it, and disposing of it in an environmentally responsible manner – all without a second thought by you.

NO-NO-NO-NO. I don't flush. We're on water conservation here in Arizona. Wrong again.

7:20 a.m. As you are getting dressed, a glance outside the window shows some ominous clouds. You check the weather on your TV. All these weather forecasts are made possible by information gathered and analyzed by the National Weather Service, a government agency. Everyday, on your behalf, it takes in 190,000 weather observations from surface stations, 2,700 from ships, 115,000 from aircraft, 18,000 for buoys, 250,000 from balloons, and 140 million from satellites – all just to help you plan what to wear and make sure you don’t get stuck in a snow storm. And oh yes, this agency may save your life with its hurricane and tornado warnings.

How WRONG you are!!! I drive a 4 WD Toyota Tundra. I don't care about no stinkin' "weather reports". :roll: :roll: Besides, have you ever BEEN to Arizona? We have the SAME weather 335 days a year. Even YOU could predict our weather....

7:30 a.m. Before you leave home, you take your pills to control your high blood pressure. But how do you know that this medicine is safe or effective? Without the testing required by the Food and Drug Administration, you wouldn’t. And without the vigilance of the FDA, you could easily fall victim to unscrupulous marketers of unsafe and worthless medicines.

Again, FIT AS A FIDDLE. Haven't bought any prescription medicine (legal or illegal) for over 20 years.

7:45 a.m. You put a couple of letters in your mailbox. For less than the price of a cup of coffee, a government employee will come to your house, pick up the letters, and have them delivered in a few days to someone on the other side of the country. A pretty good deal.

Never use the USPS. Don't trust it. I know, because my sister WORKS for that useless pit of a government "program". I pay all my bills with on-line Bill Pay. You're batting an O-fer!!

7:50 a.m. You and your child walk across the lawn to your car and arrive without getting dog poop on your shoes. A small but welcome achievement that is made possible now by a local law that requires people to clean up after their pets. Also, the reason your neighborhood is not plagued by stray cats and dogs is that your local Animal Control officer is on the job dealing with this constant problem.

:lol: :lol: :lol: Lawn. In Arizona. You're funny. Stray cats and dogs. In the desert. With coyotes, hawks, owls, etc. You a funny guy.

7:52 a.m. You help your young child into your car and you pull out of your driveway. You have now entered an experience that is improved by government in almost more ways that you can count. Driving your car is inherently dangerous. But it is made immensely safer by government laws and regulations, such as those mandating child safety seats and the use of seat belts – rules that have saved tens of thousands of lives. Driving down the street is also made much safer by a local government that enforces traffic laws and discourages people from driving too fast or driving drunk. Most state governments also minimize your risk of being run into by someone driving on bald tires or with faulty breaks by requiring regular inspections of all vehicles. And state drivers license examinations ensure that all drivers are at least minimally competent and can actually see the road. In addition, if you are hit by another car, the potentially disastrous costs of an accident are covered because the government requires that all drivers to have auto insurance. In fact, without this extensive network of government laws and regulations covering automobiles and driving, it would be foolish for us to ever venture out on the road.

Millions and millions of us survived childhood WITHOUT goverment intervention and the "requirement" of seatbelts. And I grew up in a state that had no speed limits. And the "government mandated" insurance usually finds a way to FUCK you by paying some lower amount....where's your benevolent government THEN???

8:15 a.m. You drop your child off at day-care. It took a long search to find a good program and it is an expensive one, but it is worth it so you can feel confident that your child is in a safe, nurturing, and stimulating environment while you are at work. One of the reasons you can afford this program is the $3,000 child care tax credit you get from the federal government every year. Equally important, your child benefits from the fact that most state governments now enforce day-care requirements for group size, ratios of children per staff member, teacher training, nutrition, health, safety, and space requirements.

We home schooled. Wife quit work because it was cheaper to STAY HOME and not pay for daycare, government taxes, etc. taken out of her paycheck.

8:35 a.m. Your trip on the freeway is much safer due to federal restrictions on the number of hours that truck drivers can operate their vehicles without resting. Thousands of people die every year from truck-related traffic accidents, but it would be much worse without these regulations that keep sleepy truck drivers off the road.

Truck drivers routinely ignore those "restrictions", and the highways are a mess. Ever driven on L.A.'s freeways? Yeah...you're free to SIT IN TRAFFIC on pothole-filled roads. WAFJ.

8:55 a.m. You arrive at work and take the elevator. You just assume that the elevator is safe; and it is, thanks in part to the annual elevator inspections conducted by your state government. It is probably nothing you will appreciate until the next time the elevator breaks down with you inside, and that makes you think a bit more about the reliability of elevators.

WRONGO, MR. WALRUS!!!! Even when I worked in a 12th floor office, I kept in perfect shape (see above) by taking the STAIRS up 12 flights. Yep! :nod: :nod:

9:00 a.m. While at work, your rights and wellbeing are constantly protected by a wide-ranging network of federal and state laws. The Occupation Safety and Health Act works to protect you from unsafe and unhealthy work conditions. Federal law protects you from workplace discrimination based on race, gender, religion, national origin, or disability. State laws may also require your employer to purchase worker’s compensation insurance so that you are covered in case you are injured on the job.

NEWSFLASH: This "network of federal and state laws" cause more job losses each year than they "protect" by driving countless business out of business with miles and miles of typical bureaucratic red tape.

Noon. For lunch you have your usual sandwich and microwaveable cup of soup. But why did you choose that particular soup? Perhaps because it was low in salt and fat. But how do you know that? Because the government requires all food packaging to have a truthful and easily readable panel on the label that supplies you with the nutritional information necessary to make a good choice. Food companies tell you what they want you to know about their products, but the Food and Drug Administration’s labeling requirements tell you what you need to know to eat in a healthy way.

Soup. That's a laugh. And those labels are so inaccurate as to be almost laughable. You actually BELIEVE that shit?

How do you know the lettuce in your sandwich is not laced with unhealthy doses of pesticides? Because the Department of Agriculture has developed and is enforcing uniform standards for pesticide residue on raw foods.

I hate lettuce.

Microwave ovens are potentially very dangerous machines, but you can use this one with confidence because of detailed government regulations that limit the maximum amount of radiation leakage and mandate two different safety interlocks that prevent its operation with the door ajar or open.

You get more "microwaves" standing out in the smokers pit sucking down that cancer stick than you'd get if you put your fucking HEAD into a microwave on high.

12:45 p.m. After lunch, you walk to a nearby ATM and get some cash out of your account – and your money is actually there. That wasn't always true during the economic depression of the 1930s when many banks failed. But your money is safe -- as it was during the recent financial and banking crisis -- because the government guarantees your deposits. In addition, those pieces of paper you put in your wallet are only worth something thanks to the federal government. Our monetary system is entirely a government creation, and the value of money is only maintained because the government regulates the money supply and protects it from counterfeiters. Quite an important service really.

Now THIS is funny. Did you just use the "goverment" and "regulates money supply" in the same sentence? If by "regulate" you mean "print it like there's no tomorrow" then you might be onto something.

1:00 p.m. Back at work you hear rumors about a new downsizing plan being talked about by management – a fairly typical occurrence in these days of heightened national and international corporate competition. You know your job is one that could be lost, but you also know that you will be eligible for state-mandated unemployment insurance should that happen. This is just another way that government helps you to cope with the economic risks and uncertainties of a modern economy.

More government entitlement costs burdened onto the business world, actually CAUSING downsizing as operating costs SKYROCKET to keep up with all the bureacratic red tape being disseminated from D.C.

3:00 p.m. On a break, you call your elderly mother in the hospital to check on how she is recovering from her broken hip. Thanks to Medicare, her medical expenses are covered and she does not have to worry about this becoming a financial disaster for her. Thanks to the federal Family and Medical Leave act, you will also have the right to take several days off to tend to your mother when she comes home from the hospital.

My mom DIED in a hospital. Yeah....GREAT care she got. And, FYI, FMLA only applies to companies with at least 50 employees in ONE location. That about 2% of the American workforce. :lol: :lol:

3:10 p.m. You call to arrange for a physical therapist to work with your mother when she comes out of the hospital, and again this is paid for by Medicare. And you can be reasonably confident that she will get good therapy because your state Department of Health has a program of examining and licensing these therapists in order to ensure the quality of their work.

BRAGGING about entitlement programs that are to be the death of our country. How un-American. Although, it would NOT surprise me to see some sleazy doctor submit physical therapy bills to Mediare on my dead mother, once again taking adavantage of an easily corruptible government "program".

5:00 p.m. You leave work—thanks to the government-mandated 40-hour workweek. Labor Department regulations prevent your company from making you work past 5:00 unless it pays you overtime.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: Jesus, this is priceless...I haven't worked a "40 hour work week" since 1983. And believe me, the military and civilian management positions do NOT pay overtime. You really ARE out of touch, aren't you?

5:15 p.m. You stop at a local gas station to fill up. The very fact that this oil company offers this gas to you for sale is dependent on the existence of certain government laws. This company would not do business in your town without a legal system that assures them that you will pay for any gas you pump into your car. This economic exchange – like buying your house – would not be taking place without a system of statutory and common law that protects private property and regulates sales transactions. This simple sale is covered by Article Two of the Uniform Commercial Code – dozens of pages of laws that regulate every phase of a transaction for the sale of goods and provide remedies for problems that may arise.

REALLY? And how did people pay for shit BEFORE your government felt the need to REGULATE EVERY PHASE of EVERY transaction???

5:15 p.m. You pump 15 gallons of 87 octane gas into your car and pay for it. But how do you know that you really got 15 gallons, and not 14½? And that the gas was actually 87 octane? This is only ensured by the presence of that little sticker on the gas pump that shows that a worker from your city’s Division of Weights and Measures has inspected the pump and the gas. These public employees make sure that you get what you pay for – from a pound of sliced turkey breast to a carat of diamond – by constantly testing and inspecting all commercial meters and scales, and by verifying the accuracy of checkout scanners. This is a crucial service, since more than half of the income of the average family is used to purchase necessities bought by weight or measure or scanned at a checkout station.

I never did trust those stickers. NEVER. Those public employees are DEFINITELY on the take...

5:15 p.m. How do you know the price you are paying for this gasoline is a fair and competitive one? In many states, the Department of Attorney General has been responsible for finding and prosecuting cases of price manipulation and price fixing by oil companies and distributors.

REALLY....why then, is EVERY gas station charging the EXACT same price? Pure fucking MAGIC??? No "price fixing" my conservative ass...

5:30 p.m. As you drive home, you notice the tree-lined streets and the nice houses in your neighborhood – generally a pretty good place to live. Thanks again to government. Without zoning rules, you might have an auto body shop or a fast-food outlet move in next door. Or worse yet, a fertilizer plant or a toxic waste site. But there are no noxious smells in the air, no excessive and dangerous traffic on your street – thanks to your government. Pleasant and livable neighborhoods are only possible with extensive government planning and zoning regulation.

WRONG FOR THE ONE MILLIONTH TIME!!! I live in a county island. No zoning rules. And I LOVE it. Ain't no freeloadin' busybody living next to me telling me what fucking color I can paint my house, or whether I can choose to work on my automobile engine in my driveway.

5:35 p.m. As you approach your house, you see your child coming down the sidewalk. The government-provided sidewalk. The sidewalk that allows your child to walk to the neighbor’s house down the street to play with a friend without the risk of being hit by a car.

I live on a proprietary dirt road, maintained by ME (and THAT'S the TRUTH!). Ain't no sidewalks, no streetlights, none of that cityslicker SHIT to run up my already-too-high tax bill.

5:45 p.m. You go for a jog in your local public park.

There isn't a public park within 5 miles of my house. And all the parks there ARE are filled with a bunch of gay liberal soccer players.

6:30 p.m. You take your family out for dinner at a local pizza restaurant. You enjoy a good meal and no one gets sick from E. coli or other food-borne illnesses. This is in large part because your local government conducts regular inspections of all food establishments as well as those of its ingredient providers.

Actually, it's becuase we only eat out at a restaurant where we're good friends with the owner, and we trust him. Period.

7:30 p.m. Back at your house. You settle in for a quiet evening at home – one that is undisturbed by those annoying telemarketers calling you up to try to sell you something. This is because you have signed up with a state or federal no-call registry – a government service now enjoyed by over 60 million Americans.

This might be the biggest joke of a law EVER constructed by our government. This "no-call registry" did NOTHING to prevent telemarketers. NOTHING! I still get 8-10 calls a NIGHT.

8:00 p.m. You do a quick check of your e-mail – just one of the many services you enjoy over the internet everyday. We all tend to think of the internet as the product of those talented and imaginative entrepreneurs in the high-tech companies. But the internet actually began with government programs that created ARPANET and later NSFNET, early computer networking systems that developed the software and networking infrastructure that form the foundations of today’s internet. The government also helped to fund research that led to web browsers like Internet Explorer and search engines like Google.

I thought ALGORE invented the internet?

8:45 pm. You masturbate to a hot interracial video and are able to do so because of the freedoms granted to you by your governemnt, who chooses not to censor the Internet.

My wife does all my masterbating for me.

11:00 p.m. You go to bed. During your sleep, you are protected by a smoke detector that your city requires to be installed in every residence. Maybe you would have bought one of these yourself, but this law helps to ensure that everyone is protected from the dangers of fire. Nevermind the government-mandated fire-retardant requirement for your kids' sleepwear.

We all sleep in our birthday suits, and our dog is our only smoke detector. Most of those cheap, government "mandated" pieces of shit don't work anyway.

4:00 a.m. You are asleep in your comfy bed. Unlike that time you stayed in a small inn in Costa Rica, where you were woken up regularly at 4 in the morning by the roosters crowing in the neighborhood. By law, no one can keep roosters in your neighborhood and so you remain in blissful slumber.

Again, no zoning laws where I am...and I specifically selected a neighborhood where that was the case. Just think---you've come full circle! If you'd allow roosters, you wouldn't need the fucking alarm clock you were braying about at the very BEGINNING of this stupid article. And now, because your precious "government" won't allow ROOSTERS, my COCK hurts.

The less Goverment there is, is good, people.

My comments are bolded. :coffee:
Last edited by AZGrizFan on Thu Aug 06, 2009 2:56 pm, edited 4 times in total.
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by AZGrizFan »

TwinTownBisonFan wrote:
Ursus A. Horribilis wrote: It is a chain or at least real close to a chain that was titled "Jim get up in the morning" that I received a couple of years ago. I saw it posted on AGS a while later and I think it was blueballs that did a FIFY on the person that posted it that was pretty damn funny. I did read it and it has substance.
the only difference is, this a legit essay by a government scholar instead of a bunch of race/gay/relgion baiting written by an intern at a DC-based conktank written to sound like it was written by "joe the plumber" nor does it implore you to "forward if you agree that america was better when darkies knew their place and women were barefoot and pregnant and there were no immigrants" (ya know, the time that never existed except in the addled minds of conkus regulus)
Don't kid yourself, junior. THAT was there, Cappy just cut it off when he posted this drivel. :roll: :roll:
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by AZGrizFan »

You fuckers better read my reply to cappy's drivel. It's some of my best stuff in years. :| :| :| :coffee: :coffee:
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by TwinTownBisonFan »

AZGrizFan wrote:You fuckers better read my reply to cappy's drivel. It's some of my best stuff in years. :| :| :| :coffee: :coffee:
your wrinkled old ass still lives in Arizona - a state that sustains it's population only because YOUR GOVERNMENT built a couple dams on the Colorado River and supplies it to your dry, desert-dwelling ass. that's right, you owe the very place you live to the government... (oh, and didn't you go to a state university??? how's that subsidized college degree treatin' ya'?)

:coffee:
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by AZGrizFan »

TwinTownBisonFan wrote:
AZGrizFan wrote:You fuckers better read my reply to cappy's drivel. It's some of my best stuff in years. :| :| :| :coffee: :coffee:
your wrinkled old ass still lives in Arizona - a state that sustains it's population only because YOUR GOVERNMENT built a couple dams on the Colorado River and supplies it to your dry, desert-dwelling ass. that's right, you owe the very place you live to the government... (oh, and didn't you go to a state university??? how's that subsidized college degree treatin' ya'?)

:coffee:
...and THAT'S why we don't have lawns, and water our golf courses with waste water.

And I didn't say NO government is good...just LIMITED government. Unlike your clammy, moldy, sweat-stained ass. :coffee: :coffee: :shake:
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Re: A Day In The Life Of AZGrizFan...And The Government

Post by Pwns »

I'd bet most of those folks that say that government has never done anything for them are entitlement minded left-leaning folks who want the government to do absolutely everything.
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